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It’s been a year, but it feels like yesterday. Over 365 days passed since that fateful Saturday morning, October 7th, when I was awakened by loud explosions and sirens, causing my husband and I to jump out of bed. We banged on our daughter’s bedroom door, screaming for her to get up, and ran down the stairs, opening the front door to let our small, foxlike black dog Max inside.
We hurried into our bomb shelter and closed the door, unaware of the chaos outside. Little did we know that our lives would forever be changed. When the alarms in our area stopped sounding, we became glued to the television, watching the drama unfold. We could not grasp the horror or the magnitude of what we were witnessing.
Even today, a year later, I still feel the raw pain and anguish, writing to you and blinking back the tears that are streaming down my face.
The surreal nature of the situation is overwhelming. The loss of innocent lives, the bravery of the soldiers, the heart-wrenching stories of hostages—it all feels like a nightmare. My heart aches for the 1200 people who died that dreadful day, including my friend Ricarda’s daughter, Shani, a vibrant soul who loved to dance. The images and videos of young women, children, and the elderly taken hostage are more devastating than any horror movie.
How could this have happened, and how is this continuing? How can it be that there are 101 people still held captive underground in inhuman conditions? When will it end? Are happiness and joy even possible in these turbulent times?
Facing the new reality
When the war first broke out, running my business was far from my mind. Paralysis set in. I felt unbelievably depressed as if my life had been sucked out of my body. I couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep, and could barely move. But I found the strength to continue, to face this new reality head-on.
Of course, marketing took a back seat, and it was impossible to post on social media. I had no voice. I felt like I could scream for days at the top of my lungs, but no sound would come out. Even as a writer, I had no words. What could I possibly write about as important as life and death? All I had were tears and great sadness.
The feeling of emptiness was so overwhelming. It was as if I was reliving the pain of the death of my parents multiplied by 100 times.
Life in Israel had to go on, becoming a fight for survival. I watched my daughter’s fiance, Roy, put on his army clothes and go off to serve. He attached metal tags to his boots so that if anything happened to him, his body could be identified. I tried to put on a brave face as I hugged him and told him to stay safe. He packed supplies, not knowing when he would return, and my husband drove him 35 minutes to the base while rockets were exploding overhead.
I was helpless, constantly listening to the television for news, tracking the missiles, and praying that I wouldn’t have to run for cover. (I have 45 seconds to get to a protected area.)
The struggle to maintain normalcy was real and constant. This became my new reality, the turbulence of living in a war zone.
Returning to life
As the days passed, I realized I couldn’t let the war consume me. I had a business to run and bills to pay. So, I slowly but surely started to return to life, to function better.
Before October 7th, I had scheduled client conversations and didn’t want to cancel. As a female business owner, I didn’t want to disappoint my clients.
I started each client meeting with these exact words. “In the event of an alarm in my area, I’ll have to stop our call and go into my bomb shelter for at least 10 minutes. Then I’ll call you back.”
As I meet with my clients, I focus on our conversations. I gather their information to write emails, articles, and social media posts to market their businesses. And then, I write—putting all my emotions aside and pouring my heart into their content.
There are so many things I can’t control, so I focus on what I can. When Roy came home on leave, I baked cookies to send back to his army unit. It was a small gesture to show my love for all they were doing to defend us and all the sacrifices they were making.
Writing is also something I can control. It takes my mind off the war, the constant sound of artillery shells, and the roar of the airforce jets overhead on their defense missions. With Max never leaving my side (he is terrified of the booming), I sit at my desk, creating magic with words and content my clients need to market themselves. It’s a reminder of the ability we all have to shape our own narratives.
Developing the ability to survive
Being resilient is finding a way to continue even when things are challenging. In order to work, I temporarily close my mind to the names and faces of the soldiers who are dying daily. I suppress the images of the female hostages and block off thoughts of what they might be suffering. I limit the amount of news and social media to prevent myself from being sucked into the abyss.
However, each day, I set aside 10 or 15 minutes to listen to the stories of soldiers’ lives, their impact, and dreams that will never be fulfilled and hear about the loved ones they leave behind. Each tragedy creates a broken family and lives that will forever be altered. And I feel the pain as if it was my own son or daughter whose life was cut short while they were in the line of duty.
I watch the families of the hostages traveling around the globe, pleading for the release of their daughters, sons, fathers, brothers, and sisters. I allow myself to feel helpless, to grieve, and I let the tears fall from my eyes.
Then, I shake it off, always searching for how to change the situation—knowing that surviving and thriving is the best revenge.
Gaining support from a community
Another way to overcome the turbulence is by connecting with a community. Other business owners in Israel openly talk about our feelings. We discuss how safe we are and how to move forward. We talk about marketing and selling during the war. We question if there is backlash from clients abroad who have different views on what is happening in Israel, causing a loss of business.
We run our businesses to keep the economy moving for ourselves, our families, and the country.
There is no choice but to rise above negative feelings and hatred and return to life. The sense of normalcy also helped keep us sane. We don’t know what tomorrow will bring, and no one does. We can only do our part to stay calm, focus, and grow our businesses. Being part of a strong community allows me never to feel alone.
Finding joy and happiness
Growing my business wasn’t the only uncertainty over the past year. My daughter Orlee planned her wedding. The date had been set, and the venue was selected. We hoped the situation wouldn’t worsen, restricting the number of guests or forcing us to cancel. And in my mind, I wondered how I could celebrate while the country is at war.
Could I put the sorrow and pain aside for this joyous occasion, my daughter’s wedding?
We also happily hoped to host friends and family flying in from Philadelphia. However, airlines refused to fly to Israel due to safety issues. Flights were canceled, and we scrambled to reschedule. We remained persistent and accepted any available flights, as they were better than having no flight at all.
I would have loved my sister, Debra, to come a week in advance to properly celebrate with Orlee. However, there would be no trip to the winery for a fancy yet intimate bridal shower. We had no time for the spa day we had planned for months.
When you put everything in perspective, the spa and the winery weren’t really important. What was important was that my sisters, brother-in-law, and friends could attend and share in the joy. The government did not restrict the number of guests, and we celebrated the wedding with 243 of our favorite people.
I consciously decided to immerse myself in enjoying the wedding day, savoring the precious moments.
I closed my eyes to take a snapshot of the joy in my daughter’s smiling face as she descended the stairs in her wedding dress. I appreciated the laughter as we curled our hair, applied our makeup, and fastened our elegant necklaces and sparkling earrings. I cried tears of happiness as Orlee and Saar walked down the aisle to stand under the wedding canopy.
A wave of gratitude washed over me as I realized the absence of the artillery noise, a stark reminder of the chaos beyond our celebration. There's an inherent whirlwind of emotions on any wedding day, so I focused on finding solace and joy while proving that love and happiness can flourish even in the darkest times.
Being resilient brings happiness
As I look back over the past year, the word that comes to mind is resilience. You can learn to pick up the pieces and live in a new reality. Sometimes, your heart might ache with so much pain and tears. That’s when you dig deep within yourself and focus on how to be happy in that moment. What will bring you joy (even if it’s temporary)?
Concentrate on what you can control. Lean on the support of your community so you never feel alone. Reach out to the people you love and who love you so they can support you on your journey.
No one knows what the future will hold. Life is full of uncertainty. When we make plans, we only fool ourselves into a false sense of security. Seek out the happiness, even if the world around you appears to be crumbling.
I want to take this opportunity to thank everyone who has expressed concern for my safety, given me encouraging support during these turbulent times, and lifted my spirits when I needed it most.
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Meet the expert:
Annette Mashi is a magical copywriter and content strategist who assists female business coaches, consultants, and design professionals by writing enchanting content to increase their visibility and attract clients they really want to work with. Escaping from an international corporate high-tech company, she's been casting spells for individuals and companies looking to stand out and tell their unique stories. With her mystical process, she captures your authentic voice, so her writing resonates with your readers as if it were conjured by your own hands.
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